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Twin honours memory of sister killed in car accident
By Dianne Cornish
Dundas Star News
February 13 2002
Cara Johnston wants teens to know that their lives depend on the choices
they make. Her sister¹s did.
The Richmond, B.C. native stressed the importance of safe teen driving
during a student assembly at Orchard Park Secondary School in Stoney Creek
recently. Close to 600 students sat spellbound as Cara recounted the story
of her sister¹s death.
Her emotion-charged presentation was also highlighted by the North American
launch of the "I Promise Program."
Developed by Dundas resident Gary Direnfeld, the program includes a
parent-teen mutual safe driving contract, and a public commitment to safe
driving enabled by a rear window decal displaying a 1-800 number to
facilitate community reports of driver behaviour.
Cara¹s story is chilling. But it is also a powerful tool promoting
change in
teen driving behaviour and that¹s why she has told it to almost half
a
million people in the last seven years.
Just one day after her 18th birthday in August, 1994, Mairin, Cara's
identical twin, made a fateful decision. She chose to be a passenger in
a
vehicle driven by her teenage boyfriend. She paid the ultimate price for
her
decision.
Mairin died in a horrific car accident when her boyfriend lost control
of
his car on a downhill S-curve while traveling 161 km/h in a 50 km/h zone.
The point of impact was the passenger's door.
"My sister died because she made the wrong choice," Cara said
in a recent
interview. Her comment isn't meant to point an accusing finger at her
sister, but rather to impress upon her audience the importance of the
choices they make in their lives. "My message is about choices and
consequences more than safe driving," Cara said.
"The only reason I'm here is because I was lucky," she confided.
She, too,
made a choice the day her sister died. She chose to be a passenger in
her
boyfriend's car even though she knew, "he sped all the time."
On the day of the fatal crash, Cara's boyfriend's car was overtaken by
her
sister's boyfriend¹s vehicle. Minutes later, she witnessed the terrible
event which took her sister's life. No one else was killed in the crash,
but
Cara says, "Half of me went with her."
The loss of her sister was all the more traumatic because of the close
connection Cara enjoyed with Mairin, largely because they were identical
twins. Also adding to the trauma was the fact that Cara saw the crash
and
got the shocking news at the scene. An ambulance attendant said the words
that are forever imbedded in her mind: "I'm sorry. Your sister didn't
make
it."
One of the most effective ways Cara found to deal with her grief was
to talk
to teenage students about her sister's tragic death and the importance
of
making the right choices.
Cara made her first presentation just three months after the crash and
has
told the story thousands of times since. She has talked to students
throughout Canada, the United States and the United Kingdom. In March,
she'll do a speaking tour in Australia.
Confident that her speaking engagements are making a difference, Cara
said
she consistently gets "wonderful feedback" from students in
her audiences.
"If at least one of them gets my message, that means my sister didn't
die in
vain," she said.
With the passage of time, Cara¹s emotional scars have healed considerably.
"I¹m not a victim; I'm not my story anymore." She has learned
to see the
tragedy as "an experience in life," something she has learned
from and can
help others with.
If anything positive has emerged from her sister's death, Cara says it's
the
chance afforded to her to have an impact on students' lives. "I couldn't
be
more grateful for the opportunity to do what I do," she said, referring
to
the many people she has met during her speaking tours.
As for the "I Promise Program," she is a staunch supporter.
The contract
between parents and teens; stressing mutual accountability for safe driving
habits, such as wearing seatbelts, adhering to speed limits and never
driving while impaired; is a key element of the program, Cara said. "It
provides an opportunity to really connect with parents and be held
accountable."
The ultimate goal of the program is to reduce the number of teens involved
in traffic mishaps. Studies show that teens are four times more likely
to be
involved in a car crash than any other age group.
"One person in every hour across North America dies in a car. That's
sick,
and yet we accept it," Cara observed.
But attitudes are changing and people like Cara and Direnfeld are getting
support from countless others in their quest to reduce teen-driver car
crashes.
The "I Promise Program" is a step in that direction.
Cara Johnston
www.carajohnston.com
Contact:
Gary
Direnfeld, Executive Director
I Promise Program
20
(905) 628-4847
gary123@sympatico.ca
www.ipromiseprogram.com
